mental-health – Rachel E Hill

The nights draw in, and mystery sets itself upon us, rain, damp, yet clings the summer sun.

Its the changing of the seasons during this October. Big decisions weigh heavy on my mind and whatever I decide I know a lot of change is coming. I face it every year, this beast of the SAD. It never gets easier, except to say that it is absolutely worth planning for.

I try Hugge, hot water bottles, gentle stretching, resting and calm. I try but always feel like I am not being as productive as I should be. I know more than most how important rest is and yet my programming is deep and I find it hard to adjust after the wonderful season of summer, knowing what is coming.

A dark cloud sitting heavy on my chest every night, every morning.

“Try being positive” I think. There are a few bits of light coming, Halloween, Fireworks night, Christmas. All leading up to the New Year and a fresh start (though we can get that feeling anytime really). Special SAD light lamps, being kind to yourself. I need to give these things to myself.

So to planning. Yes, I have found having things to look forward to is very helpful indeed to get me through the dark times. A trip to the theatre, a movie night with friends, going for a massage, having a nice meal to prepare, seasonal comforts and expeditions. “What’s next?” distracts me and fills my mind with positive feelings rather than dwelling on sadness. Therapy always helps too.

Do whatever works for you, and if your not sure what to do, do something, nothing will keep you in a spiral of negative thinking, doing something at very least will distract you and might even offer you a new experience and help you along the season too.

Sending you ease and flow during this changing time and wishing you warmth and comfort for the coming months. 💕🌟😊

Summer light begins to fade

The summer has graced us again with its fullness and light and now the sun begins to withdraw earlier every evening and show up later in the morning. Its cooling and rainy and stormy and windy and sunny and totally unpredictable. What to wear sort of leans heavily on “layering” and my brain is sad and sluggish. Sad that I know the winter is coming and sluggish because I have been very naughty and eaten what I want rather than what I should.

Three wonderful weddings we’ve been to recently and the pressure for the day of the wedding and its weather is high, but thankfully they both went well and hardly any rain was seen. But more than the weather the bond of marriage and love was clear and present. What a joy it is to be invited to celebrate, and how secure they must be to find “the one”.

So much pressure is put on couples to not only find each other but to also commit and it can be costly and fraught with problems. Many people pointed to me at these weddings saying “you’ll be next”, I know they mean well, but I control my destiny thanks.

Shake off the weight of expectation.

Formalities like this are a natural and good part of life, but remember you are the one who is in control of your life, though sometimes it doesn’t feel that way. I feel controlled by many things but I have found it can feel a bit lighter if you decide you chose it.

I chose to suffer in the past because It was what I knew and what was safe to me. I choose to be free of pain wherever possible as it no longer serves me.

Life can be a bitch sometimes. But you have to keep going. I am squeezing as much joy as I can out of the Summer season (my favourite) as possible, and reviewing my position and looking at what no longer serves me and looking to leave those parts behind.

We all have to grow and change is the only thing which is constant. May the changes you go through this month be as smooth as can be. Wishing you September peace. ☀️🍁💨

I’m back baby!

After having a year off of writing in this blog I have unintentionally picked up right where I left on the following month a whole year later. What has changed? Quite a bit actually. I have come to a realisation that I have many interests and when I speak to people about them I like to share my knowledge. Do you ever feel like your thoughts aren’t catching up with your mouth or that your writing isn’t fast enough for your thoughts? Well, that’s exactly how I’ve been feeling lately!

Its July and around the Summer Solstice I find it difficult to sleep well. A month later now and I am getting back to it and feeling better, but for a moment there I was sleep deprived with so many renewed ideas and purposes. Summer really fills me up and right now I feel overflowing, but I know that summer is not forever.

These new ideas and thoughts used to torment me in years past. Not knowing what to do with the information in my dreams. Now I try to listen a bit more and take something from those experiences.

I know I’m very lucky to be able to have and remember some of my dreams. As bizarre as they are, I take it that I naturally have a creative sensed mind and my hobbies outside of work continue to reflect that.

I have gotten more into creating and editing video these past few weeks and am experimenting with online posts and really enjoying it.

I love learning new things and being brave by taking action on these new learnings.

July is the start of the summer holidays here, we’ve already had a lot of sunshine and currently those summer storms are heavy, but sunshine and good times are plenty yet to come.

Wishing you all a wonderful summertime. ☀️😎🫶